You are not alone
While finishing up a chapter in “The Journey Back to You”, I was listening to Good Morning America. Vanessa Williams was being interviewed about her new book titled “You Have No Idea”. She said, “People judge you, people assume…You have no idea what I’ve gone through.” In the book, she confesses about being molested when she was ten by an eighteen year old. Hearing that, as I typed the final paragraph, I thought “everybody has a story.” In addition to the tragic events in her childhood, She continued to experience adversity and setbacks into her adult years. After being crowned Ms. America in 1983, nude photos of her were posted in Penthouse magazine and she was asked to resign her post. Despite all the tragedies she endured, Vanessa Williams went on to become a well known and respected entertainer; as a successful singer, and actor.
How often have you thought that you’re the only one, who has gone through some traumatic experience? How often have you said to yourself and maybe others, “you don’t know what I’ve been through.” Well you’re right, we don’t know what you’ve been through, but guess what, you’re not alone. Everyone has a story, no one is exempt. It doesn’t matter about your background or upbringing or what your financial status is or whether you’re famous or not, everyone has a story. You are not alone. Here’s the good news, if anyone ever overcome their past and fulfilled their dreams, guess what, so can you!
I know that may be hard for you to believe, but it’s true. While researching for this post, I came across the biography of, writer, producer, director, actor Tyler Perry. As a teenager, Tyler Perry suffered from depression, attempted suicide resulting from child abuse and at one point was homeless, living in his car. And yet, Perry emerged not only as one of the most recognizable names in entertainment, but as a media brand unto himself. (Yahoo.com) Talk about overcoming adversity!
Too often we allow our past to dictate what our future would look like, we either stop trying to achieve goals or we never set them; we allow our past to have a “choke hold” on our dreams. We bombard our minds with our own negative self talk and tell ourselves that we are not capable of becoming the person we would like to become or have the life we dream of having and before you know it, time has passed, you’re older and wonder how in the world did you get where you are, and why haven’t you done more with your life?
I’m going to share a well known secret with you, it’s well known, because I know you’ve heard it before, because I’ve heard it over and over again myself, by every inspirational/motivational speaker on the planet; no matter where you are in life, no matter what your age or whether you did or did not get that “all powerful” degree, YOU CAN LIVE A LIFE OF PURPOSE! You can, but you have to do it on purpose.
We take away our power and potential before we even get started and resign ourselves to lives of defeat, poverty and worse yet, conformity. And, we blame it all on our past, our upbringing. That’s bull! Whatever you experienced in the past should be used only as a guidepost; it should never regulate your future. People who have lost themselves are always looking back. They can’t imagine a future because the past is so vivid, so real. But, it’s vivid; it’s real, because you give it life!
Until you put your past in its proper place, notice I didn’t say forget your past, but put it in its proper place, and allow your reality to evolve into your present, you will never know the real you, the person who has endured all the hardships, all the pains of the past and is still standing. That person, if given a chance to be, is strong and obviously resilient with true potential and a bright future. That other person, the “victim” you keep looking back at, wanting to protect, the one who suffered all the pain and heartache, that person no longer lives there. Give yourself a chance at life, stop living from your past and start living for your future!
The question then, is how? How do we use the experiences of the past, moving forward? The key is how we perceive the past; the past should be used for growth. The past should never dictate our future. Instead of telling ourselves that what we experienced was so awful that we just can’t move forward. We need to change the way we view our past and start telling ourselves that we are more than conquerers.
Take a moment and think about when and how you’ve allowed your past to dictate your future.
Ask yourself:
1. Does what happened in my past really define me?
2. Am I now, at this moment, the same person who went through those experiences?
What you’ll find is that you are not the same person; you’re the person who endured.
Trust me, God has equipped us with everything we need to endure hard times and everything we need to become the person He’s called us to be. There is nothing that could happen to you that could stop you from becoming the person you were created to be, NOTHING! You have all that you need to become your highest and best self! Now, that said, there is someone who could keep you from becoming the person you were destined to be……..YOU. Yes you!
Follow me on this journey and find your way back to the person you were meant to be! Make a decision now and subscribe to receive weekly messages to live life with purpose on purpose©
Next week : “What’s That in Your Hand”
Grace and Peace


{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
WOW!!! this is sooo true! I myself am guilty of letting my past dictate my future. Reading your encouragement I realized that the plan that God has for my life over shaddows my past. And in order to be victorious, I have to restucture the way i’ve been approaching my obstacles and cancle my “pity party” because my future is throwing me a “Success Extravaganza” and i most definietly will be the guest of honor!
Thank you so much for you encouragement! Your words have been a blessing to me and I look forward to reading your next Blog.
May God bless you and Heaven forever smile upon you!
Jeremy, thank you for your wonderful words of encouragement! I hope this is also an invite to your “Success Extravaganza”. because I plan to be there!
What a way to encourage people to restructure their focus on life! I agree with everything that you metioned in your blog. Too often, we allow our past to determine our future, simply based on our premeditated mindsets. The Word of God instructs to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. For MOST, including myself, this task seems virtually impossible, merely because we have allowed our past circumstances to be GPS systems for our future. Past hurts, disappointments and personal failures have somehow distorted our view of what it indeed means to LIVE! I listened to Donald Lawrence discuss a book by Dr. Bill Winston entitled “The Law of Confession,” in which Winston says “we have conditioned our spirits not to believe our words because we stopped saying the right things for the right reasons.” This is ever so true! In order to LIVE LIFE WITH A PURPOSE ON PURPOSE, one must speak life to their purpose in life. Faith without works is indeed D.E.A.D. We can have ALL the faith in the world to overcome, endure, conquer and succeed. Nevertheless, if we fail to accompany our faith with work (actions that will further propel and promote our faith) then we will remain stuck.
Your Godly wisdom is indeed saturated with experience. How do I know? You write with such passion and urgency to assure that others understand how imperative it is to live a fulfilled and meaningful life. The most profound statement that gripped my attention in this blog is “There is someone who can keep you from being the person you were destined to be…YOU.” If ever truth was spoken, it was spoken then. I once heard a quote by Walt kelly through an American Comic Strip called Pogo that states “We have met the enemy and he is us.” I have an impecable deal of self searching to do. Thank you for the challenge at the end of your blog. I know that once I am honest with myself about the conclusions I come to, I will be able to see myself differently, thus, continuing the journey to Live Purposely.
Peace and Blessings in Abundance!
Crystal, thanks for the encouragement. I once read that our past is not about regrets, There are no bad memories, there are only lessons learned that make us grow stronger. Once we accept this truth, our past will no longer control us.